In all my life I have never voted until yesterday. And I voted for Obama.
One of the main reasons I voted is because of all the over-zealous people who think they know Obama. I felt like I had to call them out as being wrong. I am convinced that certain groups of people make up stories and pass them along as fact, which in turn are passed on as fact to someone else within that group.
Take, for instance, a coworker who is extremely religious. He believes that Obama's stance on abortion "will lead the country to another Holocaust like Nazi Germany." Then, there are the people who are saying that Obama is Muslim. I am not arguing that he is or is not. I am arguing that not every Muslim is a terrorist. As not every African-American is a street thug. As not every National Rifle Association member is a redn... well, that one is probably true....
All the media networks have been following the candidates in their own way, as have the American people. I spoke to someone who was going to vote for McCain because they "felt" it was right. When I pressed for what it was that made them feel that way, there was no answer. But when I asked, "what is it you have against Obama to make you vote McCain?"
I was answered with, "you know he's Muslim and a Marxist?"
"Do you know what a Marxist is?"
"A communist?"
I voted for Obama, and I am confident that we will not have a Holocaust, nor will terrorist take over the White House. I voted because narrow minded people could have voted based misconceptions, racism, and religious brainwashing. I voted for Obama because all the people who read about Marxism on Wikipedia. I voted once so the vote of hillbilly America would be offset.
And, I thought Obama's campain slogan "Change we need" that hung on his podium read like Yoda was saying it. Try it. Yoda is wise.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernel v.08
I haven't been able to write as much as I would like because I have been very busy lately. For the past several years, a colleague and I have been toying around with a new programming language, and recently a major software development company has shown interest. A lot of intere$$T. So let me tell you, my loyal friends what I have been working on.
What lead to us starting this project was the overwhelming number of programming languages and variations of similar languages- UNIX being the main culprit. While my friend was looking for tech work, it seemed that every job had different requirements and he joked that there should "be only one" (--Highlander). After talking it over with a lot of smooth 12 year old scotch, we came to realize that we should compile such a language. After a few hobby attempts, what started forming was a unified UNIX language, or kernel. We began working to make the kernel Windows compliant while, at the same time, keeping it simple. Once that was working fairly well, we began working on languages like the C's, ASP, PHP, and Java. We found that a lot of the code was similar, and sometimes used a lot of extranious code.
Last year, while testing the basic application for another friend, he joined the project. He insisted we name it and market it around. Since the project was so open to languages, we decided to call it the Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernel and show it to another friend who worked for a major computing company. This friend was amazed at its "almost artifical intelligence" and portability, and began making phone calls. Soon after, we signed a contract for a grant to continue our research, and they even put us on the payroll with the title "Engineering Researchers" under the Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernels newly created logo.
As you may know, a title like Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernel Engineering Researchers comes with a great responsibility. Like Peter Parkers spidey powers. I am pleased to announce that we will soon be releasing our product to the public and you, my private audience, will be updated on its powers before the release (2010) and get the chance to be beta testers, if you like, as soon as December of this year. You can be the Beta Users Testing Team for the Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernel Engineering Research. Maybe we will have them make you business cards!
We will also be looking for experienced programmers to be part of the Testing and Integration Team for the Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernel Engineering Research for the launch of the beta, so if you have experience, please contact me immediatly.
Also, if you have a lot experience with Boolean Language Oriented Windows Jargon and Object Balancing Spools, I could use you right away for integration onto the team. We also need a pair of Complex Object-oriented Computing and Korn Shell Universal Control Keygen Echo Redundancy Specialists.
Hopefully I will get a chance to write more once the team is staffed up, but until next time:
Moments shared with Jesus may be more fun with tequila. --hb
What lead to us starting this project was the overwhelming number of programming languages and variations of similar languages- UNIX being the main culprit. While my friend was looking for tech work, it seemed that every job had different requirements and he joked that there should "be only one" (--Highlander). After talking it over with a lot of smooth 12 year old scotch, we came to realize that we should compile such a language. After a few hobby attempts, what started forming was a unified UNIX language, or kernel. We began working to make the kernel Windows compliant while, at the same time, keeping it simple. Once that was working fairly well, we began working on languages like the C's, ASP, PHP, and Java. We found that a lot of the code was similar, and sometimes used a lot of extranious code.
Last year, while testing the basic application for another friend, he joined the project. He insisted we name it and market it around. Since the project was so open to languages, we decided to call it the Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernel and show it to another friend who worked for a major computing company. This friend was amazed at its "almost artifical intelligence" and portability, and began making phone calls. Soon after, we signed a contract for a grant to continue our research, and they even put us on the payroll with the title "Engineering Researchers" under the Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernels newly created logo.
As you may know, a title like Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernel Engineering Researchers comes with a great responsibility. Like Peter Parkers spidey powers. I am pleased to announce that we will soon be releasing our product to the public and you, my private audience, will be updated on its powers before the release (2010) and get the chance to be beta testers, if you like, as soon as December of this year. You can be the Beta Users Testing Team for the Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernel Engineering Research. Maybe we will have them make you business cards!
We will also be looking for experienced programmers to be part of the Testing and Integration Team for the Fully Ubiquitous Coding Kernel Engineering Research for the launch of the beta, so if you have experience, please contact me immediatly.
Also, if you have a lot experience with Boolean Language Oriented Windows Jargon and Object Balancing Spools, I could use you right away for integration onto the team. We also need a pair of Complex Object-oriented Computing and Korn Shell Universal Control Keygen Echo Redundancy Specialists.
Hopefully I will get a chance to write more once the team is staffed up, but until next time:
Moments shared with Jesus may be more fun with tequila. --hb
Thursday, June 5, 2008
Behavioral Science
Scientists with the Swedish Neurological and Behavioral Analysis Research Center (NABARC) in Oslo have finished 25 years of studies and are publishin their results in next month's World Science Monitor. Their years of research have concluded, scientifically, that "life is not fair."
The scientists, headed by Dr. Erik Fredicksten, studied thousands of people throughout the world from different races, cultures, sexes, and ages. During the 25 year study, Fredicksten used multiple methods research: interviewing, neurological scaning, and observation. Of the 4,200 cases, the scientist were able to prove their theory after determining that 97% have had lives that were not fair.
One such case, 14 year old Bianca Johnson from Brooklyn, New York was interviewed and stated that her older sister, Stacia (16) had more freedom and less punishment. Bianca believed that her mother was more apt to be agreeable with Stacia and says, "It's so unfair."
Another case involved 38 year old investment banker from New Delhi, India, Raj Bradeep who, after the tech boom in the 1990's was one of a few people who lost money as tech start-ups were going into the million dollar market. His wife and children were so ashamed of Bradeep that they left him for his wealthy younger brother, Hamsi, and later bore more children. Bradeep eventually lost everything he owned and now sells trinkets in the New Delhi market.
"I had everything that I had ever wanted." Raj explained. "I felt that nothing could go wrong. Then it did and it just got worse. It's not fair." He said that he could not blame his Hindi gods, but gave up his dharma because it had let him down. When asked if he felt it was his fault, he said no, explaining that "life itself is to blame. I got all my fortune from karma, then I lost it all."
Dr. Fredicksten also used advanced Electroencephalography (EEG) tests to determine the brain waves of individuals as they describe there gains and losses. Tests showed that when describing pleasurable experiences or fortunate circumstances, subjects brain waves showed increased activity. While describing the unfortunate events in their life, brain waves were shown to move in a different pattern. However, the EEG showed a baseline reading when subjects were asked to explain the reasoning or explaination behind the unfortunate events.
"The 97% of test subjects not only believed that they were not to blame for these circumstances, but they showed no increased heart beat or elevated blood pressure when describing it. The EEG showed no change in normal thought patterns. If this were a lie detector test, we would conclude that they were telling the truth."
Dr. Fredicksten concludes that study was one of the most conclusive research program ever. "With such a large percentage of subjects showing one way over another, we can only infer that our research is complete, and life is, in fact, not fair."
The scientists, headed by Dr. Erik Fredicksten, studied thousands of people throughout the world from different races, cultures, sexes, and ages. During the 25 year study, Fredicksten used multiple methods research: interviewing, neurological scaning, and observation. Of the 4,200 cases, the scientist were able to prove their theory after determining that 97% have had lives that were not fair.
One such case, 14 year old Bianca Johnson from Brooklyn, New York was interviewed and stated that her older sister, Stacia (16) had more freedom and less punishment. Bianca believed that her mother was more apt to be agreeable with Stacia and says, "It's so unfair."
Another case involved 38 year old investment banker from New Delhi, India, Raj Bradeep who, after the tech boom in the 1990's was one of a few people who lost money as tech start-ups were going into the million dollar market. His wife and children were so ashamed of Bradeep that they left him for his wealthy younger brother, Hamsi, and later bore more children. Bradeep eventually lost everything he owned and now sells trinkets in the New Delhi market.
"I had everything that I had ever wanted." Raj explained. "I felt that nothing could go wrong. Then it did and it just got worse. It's not fair." He said that he could not blame his Hindi gods, but gave up his dharma because it had let him down. When asked if he felt it was his fault, he said no, explaining that "life itself is to blame. I got all my fortune from karma, then I lost it all."
Dr. Fredicksten also used advanced Electroencephalography (EEG) tests to determine the brain waves of individuals as they describe there gains and losses. Tests showed that when describing pleasurable experiences or fortunate circumstances, subjects brain waves showed increased activity. While describing the unfortunate events in their life, brain waves were shown to move in a different pattern. However, the EEG showed a baseline reading when subjects were asked to explain the reasoning or explaination behind the unfortunate events.
"The 97% of test subjects not only believed that they were not to blame for these circumstances, but they showed no increased heart beat or elevated blood pressure when describing it. The EEG showed no change in normal thought patterns. If this were a lie detector test, we would conclude that they were telling the truth."
Dr. Fredicksten concludes that study was one of the most conclusive research program ever. "With such a large percentage of subjects showing one way over another, we can only infer that our research is complete, and life is, in fact, not fair."
Friday, May 30, 2008
Quick note....
If the Mars Phoenix Rover can send radio signals 36 million miles to NASA and they can communicate back, why the HELL does my cell phone not get reception in so many areas?
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Cogito ergo sum
An article at the NY Times online:
Over the years I have thought a lot about this kind of sci-fi medical engineering. After shows and movies like the Six Million Dollar Man, Robocop, The Terminator, and Star Wars; I have always believed that, in my lifetime, I would see bionics and cloning to help further life expectancy and/or help people with disabilities. Scientists are constantly making improvements in our everyday lives, from prosthetics to medicine, and people are living longer, more productive lives.
Then you have your religious zealots out there ruining all the fun. Let's not take into account that I am a non-religious man, that is another post all together (collect some plutonium to generate 1.21 gigawatts of electricity to power a flux capacitor in a Delorean traveling 88 mph and set the date to next year to read it). These people worship a God that they believe wants us all to do well, however, most religions frown upon things like cloning, contraception, or death penalties. For thousands of years, mankind has been making strides to lengthen life (burying people 6 feet under to prevent plague, using plants and stuff to make medicines to cure disease, banishing evil-doers in jail cells) and the life expectancy of man has increased dramatically. People 2000 years ago lived to about 25, now they live to between 80 and 110 because of all the collective knowledge of scientists and shaman that developed ways of living better.
As a man with management experience, I was very open to new ideas and suggestions to help make work a better place, be it a time saving method or a safer way to do something. I was open to try anything as long as it was not counter-productive, so when the idea passed muster and worked, we went with it. Why not make work better? Everyone looks for ways to make life better. Otherwise, there would not be coffee or Red Bull. Or Chocolate. Or cars. Or the Internet. So what I worry about is the ethical line that people will not cross because of what the Pope or Jerry Fallwell say. Life will be better if we only have sex for pro-creation? That homicidal maniac in prison that killed his wife and 5 children then ate them deserves to live? Seedless watermelons are the devils fruit?
If you told me that you could clone me, creating a new little Harry that would be kept under tight observation and preserved to be completely healthy, I would say "do it". You could take little Harry and store him on a research farm in Idaho where his life would be that of purity and perfection, then, when my liver rots from the tequila and whiskey, we harvest it and give it to me. It would be a perfect match. Or, when I am 80 and my bones hurt and my eyes don't work, transplant my brain into little Harry's young body. Then clone him again. Every 20 years I could reclone and live forever so I could see space travel.
Unethical? Maybe. It is hard for me to grasp the idea that there is the technology to create tissues and organs from pig fetuses or placentas or unused cellular organism to help save lives, cure disease, undo retardation, make people walk, and reverse aging, but we don't do it because of religion. Cloning me for organ farming might not be right because an actual person is made, but if you can clone my organs, do it.
Does your God hate you? Does your God not care about what you life becomes? Does your God want you to suffer? If your God created cows and brussel sprouts for food, water to drink, and man to better his life, then what man discovers should not be in question. If it is then God hates you.
Two monkeys with tiny sensors in their brains have learned to control a
mechanical arm with just their thoughts, using it to reach for and grab food and
even to adjust for the size and stickiness of morsels when necessary, scientists
reported on Wednesday.
Over the years I have thought a lot about this kind of sci-fi medical engineering. After shows and movies like the Six Million Dollar Man, Robocop, The Terminator, and Star Wars; I have always believed that, in my lifetime, I would see bionics and cloning to help further life expectancy and/or help people with disabilities. Scientists are constantly making improvements in our everyday lives, from prosthetics to medicine, and people are living longer, more productive lives.
Then you have your religious zealots out there ruining all the fun. Let's not take into account that I am a non-religious man, that is another post all together (collect some plutonium to generate 1.21 gigawatts of electricity to power a flux capacitor in a Delorean traveling 88 mph and set the date to next year to read it). These people worship a God that they believe wants us all to do well, however, most religions frown upon things like cloning, contraception, or death penalties. For thousands of years, mankind has been making strides to lengthen life (burying people 6 feet under to prevent plague, using plants and stuff to make medicines to cure disease, banishing evil-doers in jail cells) and the life expectancy of man has increased dramatically. People 2000 years ago lived to about 25, now they live to between 80 and 110 because of all the collective knowledge of scientists and shaman that developed ways of living better.
As a man with management experience, I was very open to new ideas and suggestions to help make work a better place, be it a time saving method or a safer way to do something. I was open to try anything as long as it was not counter-productive, so when the idea passed muster and worked, we went with it. Why not make work better? Everyone looks for ways to make life better. Otherwise, there would not be coffee or Red Bull. Or Chocolate. Or cars. Or the Internet. So what I worry about is the ethical line that people will not cross because of what the Pope or Jerry Fallwell say. Life will be better if we only have sex for pro-creation? That homicidal maniac in prison that killed his wife and 5 children then ate them deserves to live? Seedless watermelons are the devils fruit?
If you told me that you could clone me, creating a new little Harry that would be kept under tight observation and preserved to be completely healthy, I would say "do it". You could take little Harry and store him on a research farm in Idaho where his life would be that of purity and perfection, then, when my liver rots from the tequila and whiskey, we harvest it and give it to me. It would be a perfect match. Or, when I am 80 and my bones hurt and my eyes don't work, transplant my brain into little Harry's young body. Then clone him again. Every 20 years I could reclone and live forever so I could see space travel.
Unethical? Maybe. It is hard for me to grasp the idea that there is the technology to create tissues and organs from pig fetuses or placentas or unused cellular organism to help save lives, cure disease, undo retardation, make people walk, and reverse aging, but we don't do it because of religion. Cloning me for organ farming might not be right because an actual person is made, but if you can clone my organs, do it.
Does your God hate you? Does your God not care about what you life becomes? Does your God want you to suffer? If your God created cows and brussel sprouts for food, water to drink, and man to better his life, then what man discovers should not be in question. If it is then God hates you.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Me gots to right
When I was in school, we took classes called English. It was a class full of exercises that involved reading books, writing essays, and learning vocabulary. I guess that they no longer offer this class.
Speaking with people is even worse. I spend most of my day obsessing about what people say and how they are saying it. Then, unfortunately, I begin hearing myself saying these things as if I am slowly slipping into this world of idiocy.
Have you seen the movie Idiocracy? It's very funny. That is how the world is going. Haven't seen the movie? Too bad. You should.
There was a scientific study done that concluded that humanity is slowly dividing into two separate classes. One is the beautiful "normal" people, and the other is a "elfish hillpeople". If you have ever spent time in Glen Burnie, you will see that Maryland is quickly headed for the hills. Listening to these people talk, they consitantly mispronounce words and make horrible grammatical errors and its driving me nuts:
Speaking with people is even worse. I spend most of my day obsessing about what people say and how they are saying it. Then, unfortunately, I begin hearing myself saying these things as if I am slowly slipping into this world of idiocy.
Have you seen the movie Idiocracy? It's very funny. That is how the world is going. Haven't seen the movie? Too bad. You should.
There was a scientific study done that concluded that humanity is slowly dividing into two separate classes. One is the beautiful "normal" people, and the other is a "elfish hillpeople". If you have ever spent time in Glen Burnie, you will see that Maryland is quickly headed for the hills. Listening to these people talk, they consitantly mispronounce words and make horrible grammatical errors and its driving me nuts:
- Pacific: meaning "Specific". Favorite use: "They are not specifically asking for a pacific one..."
- Clamamari: meaning "Calamari".
- Question: what you say before asking a question.
- Lieberry: meaning "Library", not a new type of fruit.
- In other words: A gentleman I speak with on a regular basis ends almost every sentence with this phrase. "I went to the bank, in other words. Got some cash out of the ATM, in other words".
- You know, You know what I'm sayin', Know what I mean: I watched a show about prisons on MSNBC and where there was a pause in a sentence, there was one of these phrases. I think I heard one of them 200 times in 3 minutes. It seems the more educated one is the less they care if the person they speak with understands what is being said. One guy I work with ends every sentence with "You know, you know".
You know, I know I am not perfect, you know what I'm saying. I may have made spelling mistake or grammatical errors in this post. I sometimes catching myself blending in and speaking a little hillbilly myself. What concerns me is that young children are learning to speak this way, compounded with text messaging and internet forums, they are becoming stupid. There, I said it. You know what I'm saying?
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Karma H. Christ
So I was trying not to watch Idol Gives Back last night and I was sucked in as they donations came in upon images of the desperate and poor. I am, by no means, uncaring. I give money to charities regularly and almost gave last night as part of my duties as a human.
Then my mind spiraled out of control. I started thinking about all the benefits from years past. Band-Aid, Farm-Aid, Comic Relief, Christian Miracle Network, and countless of others since the '80's that flaunt actors and musicians as salesman to karma. These events each earn close to $20 million a piece that I hear of. Over the course of the past 20 years, that's at least $400 million from one charity. Then you have the smaller charities, individuals and fundraisers that may pull in, say $2 million. You are looking at, over the course of the year, charities making $40 million a year (this is my uneducated guess). Lets say that number carries over for the course of 20 years. That is a total of $800 million. So then you figure that there are 900 million people in Africa. You count out the "rich" nations like South Africa and Egypt and the nations that are doing well on there own, and you probably can say that 50% of that population is poor and in need of aid. With $800 million you are telling me that the proper hospitals, farm tools, farm supplies, medical supplies, or educational material can not be provided? I find it hard to believe that this money is not enough, along with all the volunteering people from almost every country, to help make this country a better place.
What am I saying? I think that the charity organizations are not fully using or giving the money to those who need it. Those who run the organizations should be investigated for where this money actually goes. Don't tell me that there are administrative fees or wages of any sort. There are volunteers willing to work and I know that a lot are, so anyone being paid should not be considered as "doing charity work."
I hope that the day comes when all this money finally makes it to whatever country and whatever child needs it, and those who are holding this money or redirecting it into non-charitable dollars wind up catching the malaria that they say they wish to eliminate.
"Karma is God's evil twin sister. She hates you more than he does." --hb
Then my mind spiraled out of control. I started thinking about all the benefits from years past. Band-Aid, Farm-Aid, Comic Relief, Christian Miracle Network, and countless of others since the '80's that flaunt actors and musicians as salesman to karma. These events each earn close to $20 million a piece that I hear of. Over the course of the past 20 years, that's at least $400 million from one charity. Then you have the smaller charities, individuals and fundraisers that may pull in, say $2 million. You are looking at, over the course of the year, charities making $40 million a year (this is my uneducated guess). Lets say that number carries over for the course of 20 years. That is a total of $800 million. So then you figure that there are 900 million people in Africa. You count out the "rich" nations like South Africa and Egypt and the nations that are doing well on there own, and you probably can say that 50% of that population is poor and in need of aid. With $800 million you are telling me that the proper hospitals, farm tools, farm supplies, medical supplies, or educational material can not be provided? I find it hard to believe that this money is not enough, along with all the volunteering people from almost every country, to help make this country a better place.
What am I saying? I think that the charity organizations are not fully using or giving the money to those who need it. Those who run the organizations should be investigated for where this money actually goes. Don't tell me that there are administrative fees or wages of any sort. There are volunteers willing to work and I know that a lot are, so anyone being paid should not be considered as "doing charity work."
I hope that the day comes when all this money finally makes it to whatever country and whatever child needs it, and those who are holding this money or redirecting it into non-charitable dollars wind up catching the malaria that they say they wish to eliminate.
"Karma is God's evil twin sister. She hates you more than he does." --hb
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Ctrl+Alt+GoF*yourself
I have been designing some corporate logos lately and when in a train station I began sketching an idea that I had for one of them. I had a No. 2 Skillcraft pencil I stole from the dentist and a yellow legal pad from who-knows-where. But I digress...
For the last 10 years, I may doodle while talking on the phone or sitting in a meeting, but rarely do I put ideas onto paper. I get the juices flowing by "sketching" right into Illustrator or Photoshop. I can change colors, fonts and such with a quick keystroke. Over time, I have gotten use to the tools and options to the point that I rarely think about keyboard shortcut or mouse clicks or combinations of the sort. In minutes I can have a mock-up of what I want to do and work from there.
So, while waiting for the train, I sketched a stylized letter 'A' as it appeared in my head. As it progressed, I was becoming pleased with the design and thinking of all the aspects that would go along with this 'A' to complete the logo. One line suddenly went askew and, in an instant, my brain said "CTRL-Z" as I flipped the pencil over to erase.
UNDO! UNDO! Stupid eraser just smears the lead. Ruining the line. Ruining the design completely! Thoughts being mumbled, CTRL-Z! CTRL-ALT-Z! CTRL-A...DELETE! F12!
I eventually threw the design away.
"Power tastes great unless you choke on it." --hb
For the last 10 years, I may doodle while talking on the phone or sitting in a meeting, but rarely do I put ideas onto paper. I get the juices flowing by "sketching" right into Illustrator or Photoshop. I can change colors, fonts and such with a quick keystroke. Over time, I have gotten use to the tools and options to the point that I rarely think about keyboard shortcut or mouse clicks or combinations of the sort. In minutes I can have a mock-up of what I want to do and work from there.
So, while waiting for the train, I sketched a stylized letter 'A' as it appeared in my head. As it progressed, I was becoming pleased with the design and thinking of all the aspects that would go along with this 'A' to complete the logo. One line suddenly went askew and, in an instant, my brain said "CTRL-Z" as I flipped the pencil over to erase.
UNDO! UNDO! Stupid eraser just smears the lead. Ruining the line. Ruining the design completely! Thoughts being mumbled, CTRL-Z! CTRL-ALT-Z! CTRL-A...DELETE! F12!
I eventually threw the design away.
"Power tastes great unless you choke on it." --hb
Monday, April 7, 2008
Curse of the Big Bang Theory
Conspiracy Theorist unite!
I have been watching the TV show "Big Bang Theory" on Monday nights. A couple of weeks ago they began the show with the song from "2001: A Space Odessy" and that week the author, Arthur C. Clark died.
Last week, they showed 3 of the charachters going to a "Planet Of The Apes" marathon and that week Charelston Heston died.
I am eagerly awaiting the new episodes because the show is very funny.
"When you look for a conspiracy you shall find it. Then the CIA will find you and kill you."--hb
I have been watching the TV show "Big Bang Theory" on Monday nights. A couple of weeks ago they began the show with the song from "2001: A Space Odessy" and that week the author, Arthur C. Clark died.
Last week, they showed 3 of the charachters going to a "Planet Of The Apes" marathon and that week Charelston Heston died.
I am eagerly awaiting the new episodes because the show is very funny.
"When you look for a conspiracy you shall find it. Then the CIA will find you and kill you."--hb
Mondays are like Tuesdays. 'Cept differnet.
When the weekend has passed and Monday morning starts with a cup of coffee and the dread of a long workweek, I find myself looking back on Saturday morning.
Saturday morning I was thinking about Monday, not thinking that I would be thinking about Saturday on Monday. I thought that Monday would be different. Not like last Monday, but more like last Tuesday. Last Tuesday I was thinking it was Wednesday most of the day, and when I finally came to the realization that it was Tuesday, and not Wednesday, I was disappointed that I was further from the weekend than I had thought. Then I was struck by the notion that next Tuesday (tomorrow) I might have the same problem.
Does every day circle around and around and around? Yes.
Today is a rainy Monday, and Tuesday will probably also be rainy. I keep thinking about Saturday already, and it will probably rain then, too.
"The sound of birds in the morning will wake you so you don't forget to sleep the day away." --hb
Saturday morning I was thinking about Monday, not thinking that I would be thinking about Saturday on Monday. I thought that Monday would be different. Not like last Monday, but more like last Tuesday. Last Tuesday I was thinking it was Wednesday most of the day, and when I finally came to the realization that it was Tuesday, and not Wednesday, I was disappointed that I was further from the weekend than I had thought. Then I was struck by the notion that next Tuesday (tomorrow) I might have the same problem.
Does every day circle around and around and around? Yes.
Today is a rainy Monday, and Tuesday will probably also be rainy. I keep thinking about Saturday already, and it will probably rain then, too.
"The sound of birds in the morning will wake you so you don't forget to sleep the day away." --hb
Friday, April 4, 2008
The randomness of arbitrary haphazardness
Free, random, quotes for your email signature. Courtesy of your pal, me.
--hb
The time is now to do as you wish, just don't be late wishing.If it takes more than 3 people to do, make sure one is a lady.
Walking under bridges is better than burning them because you won't fall through.
When your head is in the clouds, watch out for helicopters.
A man in need of a women stays lonely. A woman in need of a women probably ran out of tampons.
The walk in the woods that ends at the river may lead to enlightenment as long as you can swim. If you cannot, try to use the bridge.
Understand what people are saying between words. If you do not, make it up.
If you need the love of others to feel complete, make sure there is someone who you can love and make them love you. If they do not, you may not feel complete.
When making spaghetti, make sure you cook the noodles.
Without money in your pocket the coffee shop hates you.
Aspire to be better than you are now. Later, you can look back to see how much of an ass you were.
If traffic makes you angry, try pulling off on the side of the road and walking. That'll really piss you off.
Never mention the words "I love you" on the first date if you want to get laid.
Three bartenders walk into a church. One has a bottle of gin, one a bottle of scotch, the last a empty bottle of wine. The preacher says, "You forgot the 14 year old boy."
If you travel back in time to the place you loved the most, remember to write down the lottery numbers.
--hb
Fridays in the rain
I am the premier, self-proclaimed, "Signature Artist." What the hell is that, you ask?
A little background first. I have spent much of the past 15 years writing editorials and columns on the internet and in trade publications ranging from medical advice to graphic design to sports. Much of what I do involves lots and lots of emails to publishers and printers. In 1997 I began to get annoyed at the signature lines of peoples emails, usually advertising some product or, most annoying, quoting scripture or philosophy. As kind of a joke, I began tagging all of my emails with a made up quote that was senseless and obscure. It wasn't long until I started receiving favorable reviews and comments on the signature quotes, so I began to compile them into a hefty file on my computer and creating a script that automatically generates one to put on the bottom of each outgoing email.
Now, I would like to expand my writings to the Blogging world, as I am no longer writing for columns due to my lack of interest. My musings shall be presented here for a release of my thoughts. Enjoy
"The last thing you want in life is to be last unless you are the last to die." --hb
A little background first. I have spent much of the past 15 years writing editorials and columns on the internet and in trade publications ranging from medical advice to graphic design to sports. Much of what I do involves lots and lots of emails to publishers and printers. In 1997 I began to get annoyed at the signature lines of peoples emails, usually advertising some product or, most annoying, quoting scripture or philosophy. As kind of a joke, I began tagging all of my emails with a made up quote that was senseless and obscure. It wasn't long until I started receiving favorable reviews and comments on the signature quotes, so I began to compile them into a hefty file on my computer and creating a script that automatically generates one to put on the bottom of each outgoing email.
Now, I would like to expand my writings to the Blogging world, as I am no longer writing for columns due to my lack of interest. My musings shall be presented here for a release of my thoughts. Enjoy
"The last thing you want in life is to be last unless you are the last to die." --hb
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